17 Comments
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Diane Hobbs's avatar

Kara so beautiful and answered so many questions that have created confusion for me in similar regard. Thank you...

Sleepshop's avatar

Wow, Kara, this is beautiful. That scene of you returning home and it not being the familiar warm comfort you wanted/expected was so devastating and so real. Thank you for putting it into a context that makes some sense, and for sharing it with us. The experience of loss is at once so personal and so universal, and you write about both so eloquently.

Tara ✍️'s avatar

Gorgeous, gorgeous writing as always. I had a similar experience putting away my mother's things after she died. Ten years later, I found her purse in one of those boxes, and it was like an archive of her life-- her lipstick, her medication, her trinkets. Some days I still don't know how to be this sad.

Kara's avatar

Tara, thank you so much for your comment! It really means the world.

And Yes! I can totally imagine your Mom’s purse. So so hard. Lissy’s make-up was So Tough for me and my sister Jenny. Those very personal things that you know they used every day are mind boggling in the beginning. Of course, now I can enjoy many of her things. Thank God it gets better. But it did take years. ❤️💕❤️

Jane Kelly's avatar

Beautifully written Lis would have so proud to call you her sister and her best friend Keep well my Friend Thinking of you

Kara's avatar

Oh Jane! What a lovely thing to say! Thank you so much. It has been a sweet process for me to tell the stories. ❤️💕❤️🙏🙏🙏

Jill Thompson's avatar

"I had no idea how to be this sad." Thank you for sharing such a vulnerable moment in your grief journey. What a gift to know we are not alone when we feel this way. You are not alone dear friend.

Kara's avatar

Yes!! We are not alone. We are never alone! A huge takeaway from the whole journey. Thank you so much Jill for your lovely, thoughtful reads!! I so appreciate you. ❤️❤️❤️

Kim Danielson's avatar

Their frightfulness had all but vanished and they looked to me instead solid and restful. I love this so much and can relate so whole-heartedly.🤍

Kara's avatar

So lovely to be connected thru Ann! ❤️ I cannot wait to read your book.

Suzanne's avatar

Thank you Kara, I love reading these so much. I have an apple pie recipe in her beautiful hand writing that I make every fall. So blessed to have known her.

Kara's avatar

Oh my gosh! Me too. I have a few of her recipes and they are among my favorite things! I’m so glad you are enjoying these essays. It’s sweet to share the journey w others—esp, of course, people who knew and loved her!! 🥰❤️💕🙏

David Bisgrove's avatar

Thank you for this reflection Kara. It is similar to my experience of grief, which has its own set of rules. Always lurking beneath the surface, but not appearing when I expect. Almost like it has to surprise us to have its purging effect. Grateful for your writing.

Ann Spence's avatar

This is lovely Kara. I’ve been enjoying your writing so much! I also wanted to share a Substack of a friend of mine, Kim Danielson. I’m going to send her your post too! Call it a sub-troduction. :)

https://kimdanielson.substack.com/p/sneak-peek-at-my-memoir?r=kn5mr&utm_medium=ios

Kara's avatar

Thank you so much, Ann! Miss you and the nabe. ❤️💕 I just introduced myself to Kim and ordered her book. It looks beautiful! XO

Kara's avatar

Oh thank you sweet Di! Yeah, I had NO idea at the time that what was happening was a pretty common stress response. 🥰❤️🙏

Kara's avatar

Oh my goodness! Thank you so much. I truly appreciate your comment. I’m writing to you from those exact table and chairs right now. And they are warm, inviting, mine once again! But I suffered for sure from some dissociative stuff back then. Grief is tough. So grateful for your thoughtful read and comment. 💕🙏❤️